


flesh and bone by the telephone

by FaintlyMacabre



Series: Faintly Does Kinktober 2020 [6]
Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Angry Sex, Idiots to Lovers except they're both lovers and idiots the whole time, Junoverse | Juno Steel Universe, Other, Phone Sex, Trans Peter Nureyev
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:54:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26952463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaintlyMacabre/pseuds/FaintlyMacabre
Summary: Juno’s resorted to pacing by the time his comms finally rings.“What the hell?” he demands as soon as he picks up.“Oh, good evening to you too, dear, so good to hear your voice again,” Nureyev snaps.“Could have heard it a lot sooner if you’d bothered to say goodbye!”----Juno gets turned on while arguing with Peter and then they have phone sex about it.
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Series: Faintly Does Kinktober 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1956079
Comments: 7
Kudos: 108





	flesh and bone by the telephone

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be honest, when I mentioned the "upcoming angry phone sex fic" in the notes of [Make It Count](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26924848), it was mostly a joke because I had no idea what I was going to do with it. I FIGURED OUT WHAT TO DO WITH IT.
> 
> As for warnings, I think everything you need to know is in the tags and summary, but please let me know if that's not the case and I need to add something.
> 
> Title is from "Personal Jesus" by Depeche Mode, which is not about phone sex (but it sure could be if you squint).

Juno’s resorted to pacing by the time his comms finally rings.

“What the hell?” he demands as soon as he picks up.

“Oh, good evening to you too, _dear_ , so _good_ to hear your voice again,” Nureyev snaps.

“Could have heard it a lot sooner if you’d bothered to say goodbye!”

“And I would have if you’d bothered to come home last night!”

“I was working on—”

“A case! I know!” Nureyev says. “Nothing out of the ordinary, and it’s not as though I was just about to leave for two months! Oh, _wait_ —”

“You know where I work,” Juno counters. “I had new information, I had a deadline—”

“What you _have_ is an office in the opposite direction of the spaceport. It so happens that I had something of a deadline, too. I’m flattered that you think I’m so important that they’d hold the ship until I arrived—”

“You think I didn’t want to come home?” Juno says. He’s not really sure when he started getting hard, but his pants are now noticeably tight. He’s not really sure why, either. It’s like his body’s pissed off that he’s not going to be able to touch Nureyev for two whole months and it’s acting out. He sits down on the couch and adjusts himself. “You think I didn’t have plans for your last night here?”

“Forgive me for saying so, but how exactly do your plans help now?”

Juno ignores this. “I was going to make you dinner.” He palms himself through his pants, not trying to achieve much of anything.

“Isn’t that nice,” Nureyev says flatly. “I had the rest of your pad thai leftovers.”

“Goddamn it, I was saving that!”

“For a special occasion, perhaps?”

“For a day when I couldn’t cook, okay?”

“Then I think it served its purpose.”

“You—” Juno’s dick twitches and he tries to ignore that, too. “I got myself a new outfit.”

“Well, if your plans for me began and ended with dinner, I suppose—”

“An outfit I bought to wear for you!” Really, it was a negligee. It was black, so short it could have easily changed careers and become a shirt, with a side slit that nearly reached the top of his hip. It also had a ribbon below the bustline, nominally for tying in a bow in front, but which was also terribly convenient for tying the wearer’s hands behind their back. He’d had to keep it in the office, moving it from hiding place to hiding place, and he’d actually managed to keep Nureyev from finding it. And after all that, he hadn’t even gotten to show it off!

There’s a pause. “What kind of outfit?” Nureyev says, sounding marginally less irate.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Juno says, breathier than he’d like. Thinking about it, about what he’d wanted to do to Nureyev in it, is winding him up even more. Now he’s just uncomfortable. He gives up and undoes his pants, inadvertently groaning with relief.

“Traditionally, that is why one asks a—” Nureyev cuts himself off. “Are you… are you touching yourself right now?”

“No!” Juno answers, too quickly. “Not… yet.”

“Are you hard?” There’s a little more silk to Nureyev’s voice now. Juno’s not even sure he knows he’s doing it.

“Yes.”

There’s another pause, filled only by the faint rustle of fabric on the other end of the line. “Well then,” Nureyev says, sounding like he’s trying to keep his voice steady, “don’t you think you’d better do something about that?”

Okay, this is unexpected, but Juno can absolutely roll with it. “Yeah, I do,” he says, finally taking himself out of his underwear. God, it’s such a relief, and to be able to do this with Nureyev, even when they’re so far apart, even though they were so pissed at each other—

“Don’t think this means we’re not having this fight now,” Nureyev says, breathing a little harder.

Oh, okay. “Fine,” Juno snaps. “What else do you want to yell at me about?” His dick twitches again in his hand, and he starts up a steady, measured pace.

“Tell me about the outfit,” Nureyev says.

“Forget it,” Juno says. “I managed to keep you from finding it for this long, it’s going to stay a secret until you’re actually back to fuck me in it.”

Sharp intake of breath. “Fine,” Nureyev says. “Are you going to tell me what you planned to do with it, or is that a secret, too?”

“First, I was going to ask you to tie me up, use me however you want.”

Nureyev moans, slightly crackly over the connection. “So you were— _ah_ —going to make me do all the work?”

“And _then_ ,” Juno continues as though he wasn’t interrupted, “if that didn’t wear you out, I was going to lay you out on the bed and ride you.”

“Juno,” Nureyev says on a sigh, and Juno realizes he hasn’t heard Nureyev say his name since the day before. He’s missed that more than he knew.

“And then,” Juno says, his voice cracking, “if our legs still worked, somehow—” He's gratified to hear Nureyev chuckle softly on the line. “—I wanted to take you into the shower, clean you up, suck you off if you were up for it.”

“You have an awful lot of faith in my stamina, dear,” Nureyev says with a smile in his voice.

“I wanted to be prepared,” Juno returns. “And it’s not like that faith is unfounded.” How often has Nureyev worn him out with marathon sex, easily making him come until he thought he might never walk again? He moans at the memory of one particular night when Nureyev, in the process of preparing him, made him come on his fingers before putting on Juno’s favorite of his straps and fucking him straight through two orgasms. Back in the present, Juno pumps himself faster.

“ _Oh_ and you thought— _hah_ —working through the night was a better use of your time than giving me a proper send-off?” Nureyev’s voice is getting higher and more strained. He’s trying to hang on but it won’t be long for him, Juno knows from experience.

“It’s— _fuck_ —it’s work, Nureyev,” Juno says through gritted teeth and the heat building in his gut. “I have—oh _shit_ —have to work.”

“And you— _oh_ —don’t— _mmm_ —have to _aa_ attend to me?” Fuck, Nureyev’s close. Juno loves hearing him get like this.

“No, I don’t— _uhhh_ —have to, I— _mmm_ —I _want_ to,” Juno says. It’s getting harder and harder to string sentences together, listening to Nureyev. He’s leaking all over his hand and he can feel the first brush of his orgasm about to overtake him. “Close, really close.”

“Yes, darling, I— _oh_ , so _good_ —” Nureyev whines, actually whines.

“You gonna—?”

“Oh god, yes, Juno, I—” Nureyev moans, loudly and abruptly, losing the rest of his sentence. It’s too much for Juno, and with a couple more fast, rough strokes, he’s coming hard and moaning into his comms as well.

When he comes back to himself, he can hear Nureyev’s soft breathing on the other end of the line. “Nureyev? You still with me?”

“I’m—yes,” Nureyev says, sounding a little dazed. “That was—oh, Juno…”

“Yeah, it was.” Juno sandwiches the comms between his shoulder and his ear so he can reach for the tissue box on the coffee table.

“I’m still angry,” Nureyev says with absolutely no edge to his voice.

Juno chuckles. “Yeah, so am I—but at least partly at myself. Even if I couldn’t come home, I could have at least called.”

“So could I,” Nureyev says ruefully. “I wanted so much to spend my night at home with you that I refused to accept that you might not be able to physically be there.”

“We’re idiots,” Juno says after a moment.

Nureyev laughs. “Yes, I suppose we are, a bit.” He sighs. “I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” Juno says. Nureyev yawns. “Honey, you’ve had a full day of traveling. Did you get any sleep on the ship?”

“No,” Nureyev says through another yawn. “Couldn’t sleep, too angry.”

“Okay,” Juno says, laughing. “How about now?”

“I could sleep now,” Nureyev says. “Good night, darling. I’ll call when I can.”

“Sleep well,” Juno says, then thinks of something. “Hey, Nureyev?”

“Mm?”

“Can more of our fights be like that?” Across the hundreds of thousands of miles between them, Nureyev laughs, and Juno mentally marks off one less day to wait until he comes home. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! If you liked it, please leave a comment or kudos. If you didn't, maybe I wrote something else you'll like! And if not, well, there are lots of talented writers in this fandom so you'll probably like some of them, right?


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